If I Self-Destruct
by Drmiracle
Summary: Yes, this was it. This was her awful teenage love story that she was trapped in. Except this time, there wouldn't be an ending. She would watch, she would deal with the awful pain and she would let the jock and the cheerleader be together. She would watch. And she wouldn't care. Because if it didn't kill her, it was only making her stronger. For JaylaHeart's One-Shot Day 2013!


**Hey guys! This is for JaylaHeart's 2013 One-Shot Day!**

**Enjoy!**

**BTW; In my story, graduation never happened. The new Anubis residents just came by because they knew they'd be attending school there. Everything else happened, except graduation. **

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Anger bubbled up inside her as she watched them walk hand in hand acting so totally in love. Everyone saw it as the perfect love story. "Eddie and KT together at last! Look how they're so inlove!" No. She knew better. She knew his smiles. She had witnessed them and every time they made her melt. Those weren't his real smiles. Those were the ones that spelled lie all over his face. Those were the ones that didn't make her melt. Those were the ones that made her want to crumble up and die.

The cheerleader. That was what they called her nowadays. Yes, the kinky haired American was now a cheerleader along with a few bottle blondes and bubbly brunettes. She was one of them now.

The jock. That was what he was called nowadays. He was perfectly entwined with the incrowd. He was on the Varsity Team. He was #1. They made the perfect teenage love story. But of course here was the third wheeled girl that so badly wanted to break them up.

Yes this is that story. There's the hot jock and the bubbly cheerleader that everyone believed belonged together. And then there was her. The outsider everyone was so cold to. The only difference was the jock had history with the outsider.

History. The past that she wished could be the present. Shared smiles and stolen kisses. Those were both part of her history. She didn't share smiles and stolen kisses with him anymore. Instead she shared shy glances with him in the hallways as she made her way to class alone. He just wasn't by her side anymore. He wasn't allowed to be. She was a nobody, and he was a somebody. It couldn't get any simpler than that. The popularity rules were the same as any other "Cinderella" story out there.

But this time, there were feelings.

There were angsty feelings this time. Real ones. Not the ones portrayed by actors like Hillary Duff or Selena Gomez. There were real feelings.

And quite frankly: they burned.

They burned her bad.

Her heart was always on fire. And not how it used to be. It wasn't the good kind of on fire anymore. It was the kind that made her want to scream at the top of her lungs and beg to be a somebody so they could be together. Because she was certain he would take her back if she was a somebody.

But the rules were the rules.

If you didn't come into high school acting like the perfect girl you were an outsider.

And right now, she was the only outsider at Anubis.

Her oldest friends Joy and Fabian had left her to be in the incrowd. Nowadays Joy hung out with the cheerleaders and Fabian sat with the jocks, strumming his guitar and singing for bottle blonde barbies.

Mara was always hanging out with the inbetweeners. She wasn't a somebody. And no one expected her to be. But she wasn't a nobody like Patricia either. People knew her name and she was invited to parties and she could sit at the cheerleader table without being completely shunned. She was an inbetweener. It was the same story with Nina.

Ah, Nina.

She should've known when the dirty blonde returned to Anubis after Eddie was no longer the Osirian she'd be invited to be in the incrowd. Since Eddie wasn't an Osirian and there was no protecter for the Chosen One, there was no Chosen One.

Just like that they had changed history.

Her history.

Their history.

The history everyone knew.

It was over.

Everything was over.

Alfie was a jock now. So was Jerome. Willow was a cheerleader. She was the new Amber of the school. And now Patricia was all alone.

Her only friend was, though it pained her to say it, was Mr. Sweet. He knew all about the new "Groups" of the school, and he knew that soon enough it would happen. People were in clusters now and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

She often spent her lunches with Mr. Sweet discussing things outside of school. Things like her family, her feelings for Eddie, how much she missed her friends and often everything bunched up into one big ball of conversation. She allowed herself to cry sometimes.

Mr. Sweet understood these kinds of things. No one guessed he could be so caring.

But when he let her into his office one day after being pushed onto the floor on "accident" by Joy, she realized she had someone left. And even though it was weird talking to her ex-boyfriend's dad, she needed somebody. And he was that somebody.

So here she was now watching the jock and cheerleader walk down the hall, everyone watching them as the cheerleaders walking in a bunch behind KT and the Jocks walked in a bunch behind Eddie.

Yes, this was it. This was her awful teenage love story that she was trapped in.

Except this time, there wouldn't be an ending.

She would watch, she would deal with the awful pain and she would let the jock and the cheerleader be together.

She would watch. And she wouldn't care.

Because if it didn't kill her, it was only making her stronger.

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**Okay, this was my second angst story and I honestly am scared about what you guys will think! You probably hated it liked it or loved it, but I won't know until you review!**


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